What Your Favorite Disney Dude Says About You…As a Person

I use the term “Disney Dude” in order to include those of the non-Prince variety because why not.

Disclaimer: No squawking if I forgot to include your favorite Disney dude. There are many points of view. This happens to be mine. 

Beast/the guy he turned into allegedly known as ‘Prince Adam’

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Even though I live in France, I had to be taught how to dress nicely.

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“Belle, it’s me.” No. You were definitely not a Fabio-haired quasi-ginger before. WTH.

You read Jane Austen novels, and basically you read everything. Maybe you’ve never read anything by Freud. You like projects and teaching people things. Your friends, like your music taste, are eclectic. Your childhood crushes were the Hanson brothers. (because hair).

Basil of Baker Street

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Look at that eyebrow raise. See me rock my smoking jacket while holding a gun.

You watch Sherlock and are obsessed with Benedict Cumberbatch. Yes I know it’s obvious but true. You also probably have an English degree and have yet to successfully get your students to understand the term “Male Quest Romance.”

Prince Eric

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I’m a nice guy. Look at my bushy eyebrows.

You like boats. And had a crush on the stable boy where you took riding lessons. You want to have a boyfriend to go dancing with in random public squares, and you probably would run through a fountain for no reason. Your other favorite movie is 500 Days of Summer. If Prince Eric were real we all know he would be a mythical architect.

Aladdin

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Smirk, eyebrows, and bread? All adds up to one handsome guy.

You grew up in the 90s. You enjoy smirking and were the one in high school who said they liked ‘bad boys’ but didn’t really act upon it at all. You’ve tried to rock harem pants at least once in your life. You go to music festivals in the hopes of meeting smirking vest wearing men and are successful in such endeavors. You marry one and honeymoon in exotic locations and carpet your dining room with a tasseled rug.

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Fabulous kissy-lipped singing is my specialty.

Prince in Snow White

You have some issues if you like men that sing and wear lipstick. You were probably in musical theater in high school and performance arts in college. You have tried to make ‘fetch’ happen. You enjoy hats. You like the fashions of the 1930s.

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I walk on the wild side and laugh in the face of danger. My eyebrows tell you so.

Simba

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So beautiful and deep as I stare meaningfully into the rain.

Again probably a 90s child. You also watched a lot of Home Improvement and had a crush on Johnathan Taylor Thomas. You like sketching animals. In college you crushed on your friend who played Hamlet in your Shakespeare class. Basically you liked everyone in honors classes who also wanted to go on adventures with you. And you watch a lot of Matthew Broderick movies.

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So over all this.

Prince Charming from Cinderella

You enjoy shoes. You aspire to be the next Martha Stewart and are a social climber. You don’t care if you marry someone boring. Ah ha ha.

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Robin Hood gave me all his red clothes.

Prince Philip

You like guys who slay metaphorical dragons, aka soldiers, firemen, and astronauts. You also probably liked Luke Skywalker as a child. You are perfectly ok with dancing with random strangers you meet and then running away out of nowhere but running back to give them your phone number. You like Ryan Reynolds.

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I’m so dreamy with my man chin and ukulele skills.

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I’m suave and manly even as a frog. Just look at my eyebrows. Also I have teeth for some reason.

Prince Naveen

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So French and eyebrow-y.

You still watch Oprah. You enjoy committees. You also enjoyed Pepe Le Pew cartoons as a child for some reason. Because let’s be honest Naveen is Pepe in human form. And you like the ukulele

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I am the Aladdin of my generation. Eyebrows and smirk? Check. Now all I need is bread.

Flynn Rider

You are part of the 30% of people who watch(ed) Chuck. You appreciate adorkableness combined with devilishly handsome antics. Honestly you just want to date Zachary Levi, please?

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Look how adorably foxy I am even when I fall into my laundry basket.

Robin Hood

You enjoy Errol Flynn movies and The Princess Bride. You use the term “Foxy” un-ironically to describe someone’s attractiveness. You know either fencing or archery. You like your men scruffy-looking with the potential to be a nerf-herder. And your favorite Wes Anderson movie is Fantastic Mr. Fox.

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Yeah, I do the eyebrow thing too while I hang out in the mud with my oracular pig.

Taran

You’re so hipster you haven’t even heard of you. You enjoy Medieval Grunge movies and reading obscure high fantasy novels. You own all the Zelda games. You gripe about the film version of The Two Towers. You watch Game of Thrones because of course you do.

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I kind of look like Jesus. A real wild man would definitely not look this clean.

Tarzan

You enjoy nature and majored in Biology or anthropology in college. One of your role models is Jane Goodall and other “live in nature” folks. Your favorite band is Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes and your friends labeled you a hippie in high school. You like guys who are “deep” and look at you with intense eye-looks.

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