What Your Favorite Pixar Chick Says About You

It’s time for a new installment here: Pixar Chick Fridays! (Which became Saturday this week because my wifi is a fickle mistress). We’ve already been psychoanalyzing everyone based on male Disney characters, it’s time to trot out the ladies. Why Pixar you ask? The Disney princesses thing has been done to death on the internet. Do a lot of Pixar films fail the Bechdel test? Yes. Which is unfortunate because many of the ladies in these films are pretty compelling.

Jessie

A bright young woman with a beautiful yarn full of hair. 

You’re into strong-willed redheads and lets be honest who isn’t? Also you love that cowgirl look and adventurous spirit. You like your women with sad emotionally nuanced backstories. Additionally you love a good wacky sense of humor.

Honestly, Jessie is the Pixar character I most identify with: gangly weirdo.

When you see your favorite people

Bo Peep

So porcelain and shiny

You go for woman who knows what she wants and reaches out and grabs it. Don’t let the femme pink floof fool you, this is the kind of woman full of confidence, kindness, and some adorable pets. Annie Potts is your favorite part of Ghostbusters and Pretty in Pink.

Princess Atta

The men in this film baffle me.

Your favorite TV shows are Veep and Seinfeld. You like a woman with neuroses and sass. This chick put the dork in adorkable before New Girl was a thing. You go for giant blue eyes that judge your behavior when you mess up. And trust me, you will mess up. Most of all you love ladies in positions of power in a matriarchal society.

Celia

Sushi anyone? 

You like purple and your favorite mythology character is Medusa. You like taking your dates to hard to get into sushi restaurants and love a lady who is impressed by this. You love a good New York accent and a girl who knows what she wants.

Rosie 

I definitely have some stories about my past lives.

You aren’t afraid of a woman who could kill you if she wanted to. You enjoy vaguely goth ladies with legs for days. You enjoy the films of Bonnie Hunt. All of them, even Cheaper by the Dozen, because she’s a classy lady with a great voice. You appreciate a woman who does not suffer fools.

 

ElastiGirl/Helen Parr

 

You like snarky redheads who age into gorgeous auburn haired women with a mom cut. You like women who can handle themselves in any situation that comes their way and do it with both attitude and class. You enjoy Mama Bear types, because do not cross this one when it comes to the people she cares about. Helen is #goals. Always marry Elastigirl.

Violet

Are we having Tony-Loaf?

You go for the seemingly shy wallflower types who are actually full of depth and sarcasm. You own a lot of Sarah Vowell books. Your favorite actress is Aubrey Plaza. You also enjoy women who have a hidden weirdo side. You love Olivia Olson and Marceline the Vampire Queen.

Generic Teen interests 2004 edition.

 

What Your Favorite Disney Dude Says About You Part 3

And we are back Humans! By popular demand! I consulted my sources and have more animated dudes for you to analyze your life choices by. And for those of you that are more interested in those of the female persuasion, I may be cooking up something for you so stay tuned.

Kristoff

Need some ice towed or a fun wedding date? I’m your guy. 

If you like Kristoff you fall into one of three categories: people who follow lumbersexual accounts on Instagram, people who follow the Jonathan Groff’s Bike Helmet account on Instagram, or people who follow both of these Instagram accounts. You like rosy cheeks. You’re into the boy next door mountain man type you can bring to dinner at your parents’ house. You enjoy sarcasm, loyalty, and musical theater. You like a man who’s just as loyal to his pets/buddies as he is to you. You may have watched the Groffsauce and Lin-Manuel Miranda friendship video on youtube more times than should be allowed.

 

Hans 

My sideburns are very deceiving

You fall for false advertising all the time. You still have The Perfect Pancake, Hairdini, and Turbie Towel. You’re also just a sucker for a well coiffed man with deceivingly sincere eyebrows and ginger freckles. Come on Disney why is the ginger evil? You probably just really also like musical theater and watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend so you can see Santino Fontana being not-evil. (Seriously if you haven’t yet, watch that show. It’s on Netflix, you have no choice).

Gaston 

Which way is the gym brah? Cross-fit? 

You date bro-dudes who like to get swole at the gym, do cross-fit, drink brotein shakes, and are super misogynist to you. Your house is covered in empty beer tankards and those stupid bro-tanks with the sides cut open. (Also probably some super deep v-neck tees). You actually enjoy the patriarchy for some reason. You probably look like one of the bimbettes who faint in his presence in the movie. Honey, you need help.

Lumiere

Doing the eyebrow raise like I invented it. 

You like Don Juan types and bisexual candlesticks who turn back into a stereotypical Frenchman by the end of the movie I guess. You’re a foodie and enjoy dinner theater. You spent a summer abroad in Paris and Lumiere reminds you of the men there apparently. Your go-to Halloween costume is French maid. But in the most culturally sensitive way possible because you did study abroad there. You only serve Bordeaux wine at your parties and are an expert wino.

Hercules 

Actual Precious Cinnamon Roll

You were a Classical Studies/Mythology major in college. You’re super into Greek and other types of mythology and you love this movie despite its inaccuracies. You appreciate a man who doesn’t skip leg day but also is utterly devoted to you. Herc is a redhead with nice Greek youth curls and that killer smile that gets you every time. Just throwing this out there but you probably also enjoy the acting style of Andrew Rannells.

Jake (From Rescuers Down Under)

Heart = melted 

You are into the rugged, outdoorsy, hiking, and crocodile wrestling type. Growing up, you watched a lot of shows like Jack Hanna’s Animal Adventures, Kratt’s Creatures and Steve Erwin: Crocodile Hunter. You’re a sucker for an accent and like the Hemsworths and Hugh Jackman. Your dream job is to work at a zoo. You and your ideal mate both rock those khaki shorts like nobody’s business.

Fix It Felix Jr.

I knock Maxwell’s Silver Hammer out of the park. 

You love a good handyman and watch a lot of HGTV, Property Brothers in particular. You’re looking for someone good-natured, helpful, and willing to help you build your dream home in Napa Valley. You also just really enjoy 30 Rock, Martin Freeman, and fun-sized guys. You probably own a pair of Timberlands.

Thoughts on Bowie

 

My heart hurts a little now every time I hear Space Oddity. It was the first Bowie song I fell in love with and the first thing I thought to put on in my delirious state on Monday when I heard the news.

 News had just come over, we had five years left to cry in. News guy wept and told us, earth was really dying. 

A friend had texted me the news and in disbelief I checked the internet to be certain it was true. Then I shot off a sad text to another childhood/teenagehood close friend, my first Bowie buddy to make sure she knew and to bond in the sadness.

Denial and anger and all the stages of grief overwhelmed me as I got up and stumbled sobbing through my morning routine. I had to get to school early for a teacher meeting and it was bitter cold out and David Bowie was dead. This was the day my nightmares are made of, and it was the day before I turned 27. What a terrible birthday gift.

I’m stepping through the door
And I’m floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today

Now I never knew Bowie the man so this might seem ridiculous to you but I knew Bowie the artist through his films and music. I loved him. He was/is my number one artist.

To give you an idea of how much he means, all my adorable caring students were worried I wouldn’t be at work when they heard the news. “Poor Callaghan.” I told them being at school with them was a good place to mourn a great artist. My kids know, like me, what it was life to “freak out in a Moonage Daydream.” They offered hugs and condolences. A colleague said she considered picking up a sympathy card for me. At an art school full of Bowie fans, somehow I was the one everyone knew would be devastated. In a way it showed me how fortunate I am to work with such great teachers and students.

Oh no love! you’re not alone
You’re watching yourself but you’re too unfair
You got your head all tangled up but if I could only make you care
Oh no love! you’re not alone
No matter what or who you’ve been
No matter when or where you’ve seen
All the knives seem to lacerate your brain
I’ve had my share, I’ll help you with the pain
You’re not alone

Bowie had always been in my life, from hearing his music as a kid to growing to love it all as an adult. I felt “Under Pressure” during finals in college, jammed good with Weird and Gilly, and when my grandmother passed away I listened to “Rock and Roll Suicide” on repeat and it helped me with the pain somehow.

Like most 80s and 90s children, my first real introduction to Bowie was at the age of 11 watching Jim Henson’s film Labyrinth. 

Dance Magic Dance. Best scene in the film.

Like most kids, it was a coming of age film for me in which I realized that I, like Sarah was growing up. The Goblin King was the highlight of the film for me in the umpteen times my siblings and I watched and re-watched it, singing Dance Magic Dance to each other.

That hair though. Backdrop leftover from the Low album photoshoot?

 

Yes Bowie was Goblin King of the weird, wild, and wonderful. The Spaceman who showed us it was ok to be a bit strange, a bit of an outsider. A weirdo if you will. To harness out creativity to create something new and different. His music and films brought joy to many and with his passing we all felt that loss. As a man he was as flawed as we are but as an artist his influence was wondrous. Many of my favorite artists would probably not exits were it not for him. I dare say my own artistic undertakings take inspiration from him.

I couldn’t begin to pick a favorite Bowie era. (Or Maybe I can. It’s Ziggy Stardust with Diamond Dogs, German Period Bowie, and Thin White Duke Bowie coming in second, third, and fourth).

Is it nice in your snow storm, freezing your brain?
Do you think that your face looks the same?
Then let it be, it’s all I ever wanted
It’s a street with a deal, and a taste
It’s got claws, it’s got me, it’s got you …

All this week, I had been feeling like no unicorns existed in the world anymore. It felt like a bit of color was gone and I felt like either the Last Unicorn herself or even Schmendrick. But by talking with others and going to various Bowie events and memorials, I’ve realized I’m not alone. We are all star people and unicorns carrying on the legacy and inspiration. And we will share the memories with the next generations. Sitting our future offspring down to watch the Goblin King cavort and to listen to the plight of Major Tom.

I’m not a prophet or a stone-age man
Just a mortal with the potential of a superman
I’m living on

My cousin and I at the “David Bowie Is” touring exhibit.

Definitive Ranking of Pixar Films According to Moi.

Last week while substitute teaching, I watched Finding Nemo in German  (Findet Nemo!). Boy, it had been an awfully long time since I had seen that movie. I had forgotten a lot of it and how it’s basically The Odyssey for kids. With Fish! In Australia! Yay! But really, it got me thinking of Pixar films as a whole and how I would rate them, especially now since there are a lot of them and more coming soon. The Good Dinosaur comes out next year, followed by Finding Dory, and the promise of a sequel to The Incredibles (yay!) and another Cars sequel (nay).

So without further ado here is my list.

1. Wall-E. I love the hell out of this little robot guy. While this film is very different from the usual Pixar fare, it is in my opinion the most artistic, the most risk-taking, and the most beautiful and heart-felt of all of them. Only Pixar could make us care about a love story between two robots. I also like the post-apocalyptic nature of the story. It’s kind of a futuristic re-imagining of the Noah story, Eve is the white dove who brings back the olive-branch. Humanity re-populates the earth, etc. It’s just such a beautiful film.

2. The Toy Story films, collectively. These three films are Pixar’s masterpiece. This is the heart of Pixar, the first Toy Story is the one that started it all and I have such fond memories of it growing up. The trilogy grew with that first audience and even kids who weren’t alive to see this first one in theaters still enjoy it. The heart of Pixar is friendship and family and the bonds we form with others. Toy Story taught us to value that.

3. The Incredibles. One of the funnest, most hilarious Pixar films of all. I also wanted to be Elasta-girl when I first saw this movie when it came out. Really she is the ideal strong fantastic female role model. She does it all! And has fabulous hair while she does it. (Forget about Merida, but more on that later).

4. Monsters Inc. Everyone loves this movie. Mike and Sully have probably the best Pixar bromance since Buzz and Woody. This movie is the most quoted by my sibs and I. Seriously it scares me how much I have memorized of this film. This one ranks high because of the nostalgia vote.

5. Ratatouille. This film ranks in the weird/artsy era of Pixar. It has a unique charm and is so darn French. I just love it. The concept is super weird but yet it follows its own bizarre logic so well it becomes endearing.

6. Up. Don’t squawk that I ranked this so low. Yes it is a charming story and beautifully animated. But at the same time I think it was over-hyped as super artsy quasi-hipster fare. It still ranks above and beyond most animated schlock that gets made these days, but it just doesn’t live up to the hype for me. And way too many hipstery photo-shoots are all over Pinterest because of it.

7. Finding Nemo. I’ve posted before my satirical thoughts about this movie. And I do still think it’s scary and super emotional. But it is also a great story and a well done sort of re-imagining of Homer’s Odyssey but more child friendly and with fish. Not to mention it is beautifully animated like all good Pixar films.

8. A Bug’s Life. Pixar’s sophomore effort has always been underrated in my opinion. While it’s not as grand as many of it’s other films it still holds up in my opinion. It’s very cute, has memorable characters and hilarious dialogue.

9. Brave. This was a film I was supposed to love more than I did. First female protagonist? From a Celtic country? Accurately represents what life with curly hair is like? All things I should love except only the latter is something she succeeded in doing for me. Merida was supposed to be so, so cool. But this film fell flat of it’s potential. I really think it was because the story was re-written after half the animation was done. it could have been such a great fantasy-epic. I would like to have known what this film was before the re-write. That said, the mother-daughter relationship here was very real and heart-warming. Otherwise this movie was basically Brother Bear meets How to Train Your Dragon.

10. Cars. This was cute. The soundtrack wasn’t too bad. It was just cute the first time and maybe it’s just because I enjoy Owen Wilson. The most annoying thing about this movie was Mater. And the fact that it became such a huge marketing ploy for the company it just was so over-commercialized in a confusing way. Much like NASCAR racing.

11. Monsters University. Again, cute. But not amazing in any sense or really living up to the spirit of the original. Some funny inside jokey references to the first film. But really nothing groundbreaking like previous films.

12. Cars 2. The worst piece of dreck to be animated and possible the worst animated film of all time besides late era Don Bluth and most of the other schleck that gets green-lighted these days. (I’m looking at you The Nut Job and Shrek 15: It’s only a matter of time). Let’s take the most annoying thing from the first movie, Mater, and make a film centered around him. Bad form Pixar. Bad form. I thought better of you. This was actually the first Pixar film that made me question their integrity and creative genius. They stooped so low to cash-in on merchandising. My dreams were shattered. But the future looks bright. (Looking forward to you, The Good Dinosaur).

 

 

Deserted Island Albums

Hello nerds. I haven’t written in awhile because I’ve been out living life, kicking butt and taking names. Today I wanted to talk about desert island albums. Everyone always plays the game like what books would you take with you which is cool and challenging for us book nerds (East of Eden, Franny and Zooey, The Sun Also Rises, Anna Karenina, The Princess Bride, BTW).

But what about Music Albums? We live in the days of fast accessible music. We like our easy to access singles that we can put together on a playlist. When was the last time you listened to an album? The WHOLE album without skipping anything. Yeah I know I got you there. I’m not immune to it either. I still buy whole CDs of bands or artists I care about and there are certain ones that I skip around on, but then there are those I love and listen to non-stop. Here they are in no particular order, my top deserted island Albums.

1. Modern Vampires of the City-Vampire Weekend.

Not only was this my favorite album of 2013, but it might just be my all-time favorite album ever. I love Vampire Weekend, but this is truly their greatest album. I’ve been a fan since the beginning and I feel like they’ve grown along with me. They were my number one in college, pretty sure everyone was listening to them back then because of “A-Punk,” and “Campus.” But the themes here of facing death, disillusionment, youth, young adulthood etc. speak to me now and I feel like they always will in a way. I just love Ezra Koenig’s voice on a lot of the tracks, even when he’s just talking like in “Finger Back.” There is something to be said about every track on this album but the best is by far “Unbelievers.” The beat, the signature ethnic instruments, everything. I just love it. Can’t get enough of it. Marry me Ezzy Koenig?

2. Helplessness Blues-Fleet Foxes

Oh the Foxes. I love their first album as well but there is just something about Helplessness Blues I can’t get enough of. It came out when I first graduated from undergrad, and I think that might have something to do with it. They really capture the ethos of the young, confused and newly cast into adulthood. They toured around this time too, and I remember being too poor to go see them. The titular song is probably the best, followed by Montezuma, and The Shrine/An Argument. SO much harmonies and loveliness.

3. For Emma, Forever Ago– Bon Iver

Can’t love you enough Justin Vernon. This album features the classic, perennial, favorite “Skinny Love,” which will always be the perfect song to make you happy and sad at the same time. But the whole album is a lovely classic as a whole. Vernon wrote it alone in a cabin after a bad break-up, therefore making it the ultimate hipster art piece.

4. Hunky Dory-David Bowie

Probably my favorite Bowie album. I have many. The Man wrote many, he’s just that great and timeless. But this album just gives me crazy chills because I love every minute of it. It was the one album I searched and searched to find so I finally caved and asked for it for Christmas. I wanted to own it physically, unlike many of my other Bowie albums which live on my phone and iTunes account. Hunky Dory also features some of my favorite Bowie songs (a lot of which are featured in The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, one of my favorite films): Changes, Oh! You Pretty Things, Life on Mars, and Queen Bitch. I will forever love Bowie, and this will forever be one of the greatest pieces of art I own.

5. The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars-David Bowie.

Yes I know I have two Bowie albums in a row, what about it? If I’m being completely honest with myself, the album I listened to constantly other than Modern Vampires, was Ziggy. I just really love this album. It’s very glam-rocky and fun and delightful. And it just kind of describes my 2013 somehow. There was a song for everything. And Rock & Roll Suicide is just a comforting reminder that I’m “Not alone,” and that I’m “wonderful.” It was on repeat along with “Better Days,” by Edwarde Sharpe (Whom I love but none of their albums as a whole work for me) when my grandmother passed away. I have my methods of grieving.

6. Kiss Each Other Clean and Ghost On Ghost-Iron and Wine

I love Sam Beam. I love Iron and Wine. I love all their albums, and I loved seeing them live and probably will see them again this year. These two more recent albums just hold a special place for me. I love Beam’s other albums too, but I just tend to listen to both of these a lot over and over. I really like “Grace for Saints and Ramblers,” “Caught in the Briars,” “Winter Prayers,” “Tree by the River,” and “Walking Far From Home.” Sam Beam has that lovely southern gentleman quality to his singing that is just so great and calming but exciting at the same time.  (Check out his cover of “Fairytale of New York” with Kathleen Edwards and Glen Hansard on Jimmy Fallon).

7. In the Aeroplane Over the Sea-Neutral Milk Hotel

Let’s just acknowledge that every hipster, 20-something, cool person, dudes I will date, what have you, owns this album because it is the greatest piece of art ever. Every song is great, there are no duds. I am psyched for their reunion tour even though they won’t be coming to Michigan but whatever. If you haven’t listened to them yet, please do, you are missing out.

8. 10,000 Maniacs MTV Unplugged-10,000 Maniacs

Do you remember when Unplugged albums were a thing? Heck when MTV was about music? If you ask me what the 90s and my childhood sounds like I will not say Brittany Spears or Justin Timberlake. I will say Natalie Merchant. My mom listened to this album a lot when she was cleaning or making dinner so listening to it makes me want meatloaf and to smell Pine-Sol and dust furniture. It’s like I was incepted by this album as a child. But I still listen to it. Did I take it from my mom and copy it to my iTunes without really asking? Yes. Don’t we all wish we could look as fantastic as Natalie Merchant does perching atop a stool singing and wearing black nylons? I think everyone should listen to the 10,000 Maniacs, as a reminder of a time when life was simpler, and you could learn about Jack Kerouac before you were old enough to read stuff by the Beat Generation.

9. More Adventurous-Rilo Kiley 

Jenny Lewis is the queen. She is like the red-headed sexier Zooey Deschanel. (Whom I love, but sometimes her adorkableness can go too far). I love me some girl rock. Even though there are dudes in the band, Rilo Kiley is kind of girly in the best possible way. I love the rock but also country/rockabilly sound. (The old good kind of country, not this red-neck stuff you hear now). “Portions for Foxes” and “I Never” are my favorites on this album. The Vintage dress shop I go to was playing this album one time I was there. So I associate it with trying on awesome vintage dresses which is always a good feeling.

10. Begin to Hope-Regina Spektor.

She really can do no wrong and I love all her albums but I especially love this one. So much beauty. “Samson” is one of my all time favorite songs by her (besides “Hero”) It’s just so beautiful and sensual and touching and musically brilliant. Keep making music, Spektor.

What Your Favorite Disney Dude says about you Part Deux

There are plenty of Disney Dudes I didn’t cover in my previous post so here we go.

My chin could cut glass.

Kronk.

Let me just say, can I be your friend? If he is your favorite then you are possibly the coolest person ever and have excellent taste in men because Kronk is the ideal guy. Clearly you enjoy funny men with a sense of humor and interesting hobbies like playing exotic bird bingo and speaking squirrel. You enjoy a big strong guy who can make a great dinner and help you whip up that dish to pass on your way to the family barbecue. You’re looking for a good life partner and Kronk is the perfect choice. Just don’t ask him to mix the drinks.

I wear tights, can fly and have a fairy friend whom I have placed permanently in the friend-zone. Such great boyfriend material.

Then again I do look pretty cool while sword-fighting. I’m like Jim Hawkins if he could fly

Peter Pan

You might have some dating issues on the horizon if not already. I guess he would make a good 12 year old crush but from an adult stand point? NO. Be honest with yourself, he doesn’t want to grow up. You clearly are interested in man-children who want to pal around in the woods with their bros and play video games or go larping in animal suits. You probably think Judd Apatow movies are about your life. You are ok with leggings as pants worn by any gender, clearly.

Taking my art seriously. Basically the original hipster.

Roger

You go for the musician, artist type. Your favorite actor is probably Jason Segel. You enjoy gangly adorkable guys who are super into their craft but also super into you and your pets. You believe in love at first my dog literally set us up on a date. And you are ok when your significant other writes a song about how your old school friend is evil. Although how you did not realize this on your own is baffling.

Dedication personified.

Guy from Paperman

This guy is Joseph Gordon Levitt in 500 Days of Summer, Jim Halpert, and Roger all rolled into one goofy package. He’s adorkable. He does everything to reconnect with the cute girl he fell for at the train. He’s the American ideal. You probably saw this short film before “Wreck-It Ralph” which means you haven’t given up hope on Disney films after “Princess and the Frog.” You probably grew up during the Disney Renaissance and still remember what Disney magic is like. This short film made you realize that magic wasn’t gone. Can we be friends?

I’m getting kinda fond of you kid.

Genie from Aladdin

You enjoy blue people and 90s comedians so you probably also have a crush on Megamind. You enjoy puns and celebrity impersonations. You think it is perfectly acceptable to wear Hawaiian shirts even when not on vacation or on the set of Forgetting Sarah Marshall. You like your men to be able to provide you with every wish and flight of fancy you have as long as they love you for you and not because of a magic spell.

Boring capitalist. You can still find guys like me at upscale bars.

John Smith

You like beautiful people darn it and you don’t care if they’re racist or played by Mel Gibson. You don’t care if your boyfriends and potential love interests have any original thoughts. You are perfectly okay that they are a product of a controlling colonizing government who speak in buzzwords and phrases. You don’t care if they want to shoot every animal that walks if it looks unfamiliar to them. You probably thought Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad was a jolly good time. The horror.

Let’s get down to business.

Li Shang

You don’t like messing around and you want to get down to business to defeat the huns. You enjoy when guys take things like training their army seriously. So you like guys who work hard. You also probably enjoy singing show tunes as if you suddenly had the voice of Donny Osmond. Your favorite Shakespeare play is Twelfth Night.

Graphic Novels How I Enjoy Thee

I love graphic novels. I’m a sucker for art and literature, something I chalk up to being the child of a graphic design artist and an English Degree holder/editor. Graphic novels combine both of these in the best way possible. In college one of my capstone classes for my English major was on the Graphic novel as literature. That was when I really got into reading literary graphic novels.

This summer I discovered my local library has accumulated a nice little collection of these books and I have taken full advantage.

Here are a few of the novels I read.

Disclaimer: I know some kids and teens might read my blog. These books are really for adults. There’s nothing wrong with mature entertainment, (Les Miserables is a prime example) you just should be an adult to read these in my opinion. I would not assign any of these for my students to read.

 

Bottomless Bellybutton by Dash Shaw.

This is my kind of novel. 3 adult siblings gather at their parents’ home where their parents announce they are divorcing. (It’s a lot like the Royal Tenenbaums). Everyone realizes how much they mean to each other etc. It also has a lot about identity, the younger brother perceives himself as a frog the whole time except for one scene where we see him as others see him. A lot of great ideas/imagery.

Habibi by Craig Thompson.

Thompson creates beauty. He is a genius. I love all of his stuff. I read Blankets in college and fell in love. His imagery is like a tapestry. This story set in the Middle East shows the turmoil and how the old outdated ways continue to exist alongside modernity and how this effects two young people growing up in the midst of it.

Ghostworld by Daniel Clowes

This is such a weird book. It’s like Daria and everything from the 90s got together in one comic. It has the show about nothing aspect of Seinfeld and the snark of Mean Girls. But at its heart it is about friendship even though both the protagonists are kind of awful people.

 

Next on my list are Watchmen, 1-800 Mice, and Persepolis. 

What Your Favorite Disney Dude Says About You…As a Person

I use the term “Disney Dude” in order to include those of the non-Prince variety because why not.

Disclaimer: No squawking if I forgot to include your favorite Disney dude. There are many points of view. This happens to be mine. 

Beast/the guy he turned into allegedly known as ‘Prince Adam’

Even though I live in France, I had to be taught how to dress nicely.

“Belle, it’s me.” No. You were definitely not a Fabio-haired quasi-ginger before. WTH.

You read Jane Austen novels, and basically you read everything. Maybe you’ve never read anything by Freud. You like projects and teaching people things. Your friends, like your music taste, are eclectic. Your childhood crushes were the Hanson brothers. (because hair).

Basil of Baker Street

Look at that eyebrow raise. See me rock my smoking jacket while holding a gun.

You watch Sherlock and are obsessed with Benedict Cumberbatch. Yes I know it’s obvious but true. You also probably have an English degree and have yet to successfully get your students to understand the term “Male Quest Romance.”

Prince Eric

I’m a nice guy. Look at my bushy eyebrows.

You like boats. And had a crush on the stable boy where you took riding lessons. You want to have a boyfriend to go dancing with in random public squares, and you probably would run through a fountain for no reason. Your other favorite movie is 500 Days of Summer. If Prince Eric were real we all know he would be a mythical architect.

Aladdin

Smirk, eyebrows, and bread? All adds up to one handsome guy.

You grew up in the 90s. You enjoy smirking and were the one in high school who said they liked ‘bad boys’ but didn’t really act upon it at all. You’ve tried to rock harem pants at least once in your life. You go to music festivals in the hopes of meeting smirking vest wearing men and are successful in such endeavors. You marry one and honeymoon in exotic locations and carpet your dining room with a tasseled rug.

Fabulous kissy-lipped singing is my specialty.

Prince in Snow White

You have some issues if you like men that sing and wear lipstick. You were probably in musical theater in high school and performance arts in college. You have tried to make ‘fetch’ happen. You enjoy hats. You like the fashions of the 1930s.

I walk on the wild side and laugh in the face of danger. My eyebrows tell you so.

Simba

So beautiful and deep as I stare meaningfully into the rain.

Again probably a 90s child. You also watched a lot of Home Improvement and had a crush on Johnathan Taylor Thomas. You like sketching animals. In college you crushed on your friend who played Hamlet in your Shakespeare class. Basically you liked everyone in honors classes who also wanted to go on adventures with you. And you watch a lot of Matthew Broderick movies.

So over all this.

Prince Charming from Cinderella

You enjoy shoes. You aspire to be the next Martha Stewart and are a social climber. You don’t care if you marry someone boring. Ah ha ha.

Robin Hood gave me all his red clothes.

Prince Philip

You like guys who slay metaphorical dragons, aka soldiers, firemen, and astronauts. You also probably liked Luke Skywalker as a child. You are perfectly ok with dancing with random strangers you meet and then running away out of nowhere but running back to give them your phone number. You like Ryan Reynolds.

I’m so dreamy with my man chin and ukulele skills.

I’m suave and manly even as a frog. Just look at my eyebrows. Also I have teeth for some reason.

Prince Naveen

So French and eyebrow-y.

You still watch Oprah. You enjoy committees. You also enjoyed Pepe Le Pew cartoons as a child for some reason. Because let’s be honest Naveen is Pepe in human form. And you like the ukulele

I am the Aladdin of my generation. Eyebrows and smirk? Check. Now all I need is bread.

Flynn Rider

You are part of the 30% of people who watch(ed) Chuck. You appreciate adorkableness combined with devilishly handsome antics. Honestly you just want to date Zachary Levi, please?

Look how adorably foxy I am even when I fall into my laundry basket.

Robin Hood

You enjoy Errol Flynn movies and The Princess Bride. You use the term “Foxy” un-ironically to describe someone’s attractiveness. You know either fencing or archery. You like your men scruffy-looking with the potential to be a nerf-herder. And your favorite Wes Anderson movie is Fantastic Mr. Fox.

Yeah, I do the eyebrow thing too while I hang out in the mud with my oracular pig.

Taran

You’re so hipster you haven’t even heard of you. You enjoy Medieval Grunge movies and reading obscure high fantasy novels. You own all the Zelda games. You gripe about the film version of The Two Towers. You watch Game of Thrones because of course you do.

I kind of look like Jesus. A real wild man would definitely not look this clean.

Tarzan

You enjoy nature and majored in Biology or anthropology in college. One of your role models is Jane Goodall and other “live in nature” folks. Your favorite band is Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes and your friends labeled you a hippie in high school. You like guys who are “deep” and look at you with intense eye-looks.

Move Over Stephanie Meyer. There’s a new Twilight in town.

Seem familiar?

Are unicorns the new vampires? They could be with the Brony craze that’s sweeping the nation. Or at least sweeping the internet portion of it. That craze surrounds Lauren Faust and Hasbro’s re-imagining of the 80’s classic My Little Pony. This recent incarnation or g4 (generation 4) is called My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic.

The question is, why is there such a craze? Is the show just that good? Is it because of creator and producer Lauren Faust? (who recently stepped down and took a more advisory role with the show, but more on that another time). Or is it just that we are that nostalgic for the 80’s and 90’s toons of our youth and this is a pretty faithful re-boot. Compared to other abominations of re-boots. (Smurfs and Michael Bay’s Transformers, yes I am looking at you).

Perhaps it is a perfect storm of all these factors which created this show and the fandom surrounding it.

One of the mane (hah hah puns) reasons I think it succeeds is because it is a show for girls that is unique in that it can be enjoyed by both genders. For the most part it doesn’t pander to its audience of try to hard to be extra politically correct or extremely pink and fluffy like many of its girly show predecessors. It takes into account both its young girl audience as well as the adult audience of the show and it caters to both in a way that is refreshing among the animated shows of today.

Firefly

G4 Re-imagined Firefly

Rainbow Dash Herself

Part of the reason for this is the way the pony protagonists are handled. Fans of the original 80s cartoon will be happy to point out that Faust based the personalities of the mane cast on the personalities she gave her own ponies as a child. Anyone who played with My Little Ponies as a child will tell you that they made up personalities and stories about their ponies that were perhaps inspired by the old cartoon but mostly a product of their own imagination. The old cartoons were good but except where Pegasus pony Firefly was concerned, fell rather short in the personality department. Faust even stated that when she created the characters she basically put Firefly’s brain into Rainbow Dash’s body.

             

Bright Eyes

As a kid, I was also a fan of the early 90s rendition of MLP called My Little PonyTales which featured a set group of 7 main characters who went to high school and lived in a town together. While this was a bit of a stretch of the imagination and most of the storylines dealt with boy problems, going to concerts and getting makeovers to get said boy ponies to like you, the protagonists at least gained personalities that the G1 ponies lacked. In particular there was the light blue and red-haired pony named Bright Eyes, studious in school, her cutie mark was a pen and notebook and she was awkward around the nice boy-pony she liked. Essentially here was a pony I could relate to. What does this have to do with MLP Friendship is Magic?

Twilight Sparkle

When I first heard of the show I was skeptical. But as soon as I watched it I was hooked. Why? Because of Twilight Sparkle. Here was a pony that was a combination of my two most favorite ponies growing up. My sparkly toy unicorn pony and Bright Eyes from the MLP-Tales show. Here was a real protagonist, a slightly awkward but intelligent, scholarly and bookish pony who was also a magic-wielding unicorn. Yes. Even as an adult, I found my relatable character that got me hooked and kept me watching.

But I stayed watching for more than just Twilight Sparkle. Each of the other pony characters were equally well-developed, funny, and interesting. (And bringing back little dragon Spike as an adorable Flounder-esque character. Awesome). Each of them reminded me of both my pony characters growing up as well as many of my personal friends. And the target kid audience responds well to the cute factor and the personalities of the ponies. My young cousins told me their favorite ponies which correspond perfectly to their personalities.

In addition to the characters, the mythological world created of Equestria and Ponyville is both fascinating and refreshing. The ponies live in a world of manticores, dragons, gryphons and other mythological beasts fit to please any fantasy enthusiast. Not to mention Princess Celestia the Pegasus-Unicorn is the pony enthusiast’s dream come true! The flash animation is also beautiful in its simplicity.

Furthermore, the show’s acknowledgement of its adult audience with shout-outs and homages to other works is clever. It is almost like the writers are sitting there thinking, “Hey, adult nerds watch this.” The most blatant recent example was from end of the second season opener, with a straight up homage to the end of Star Wars : A New Hope.

I hope this pony resurgence continues to pave the way for new kinds of fantasy or at least create a niche market. I am tired of seeing the “Paranormal Teen Romance” section of the bookstore. So shows like this as well as books like Zombies vs. Unicorns, entice me and give me hope. As a unicorn fan and someone who has a novel about unicorns I’d like to market and sell, if Bronies will read it, than props to them.  

Sonic, he’s the fastest thing alive!

Back in the young days of the early 90’s, there was a blue, brave, brazen, boy who was the fastest thing alive. And we all loved him because he was way past cool. Who was this blue, red sneaker wearing fellow? None other than Sonic the hedgehog. With his talking smoother than ice, penchant for catchphrases, speed beyond comprehension and a love for chili dogs, Sonic was one rad dude.
I never really played the video games that much, I was way into the cartoons though. Both the wacky slap-stick, Bugs Bunny-esque antics of Sonic and Tails in The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog as well as the Saturday morning incarnation Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic SatAM to its hardcore fans). With its catchy theme song, slick plots and darker atmosphere, Sonic SatAM was the epitome of post-apocalyptic, environmentalism, nature vs. Machine storyline so common in 90’s cartoons, but it was all this at its best and more.
It had sweet supporting characters who made up a team of Freedom Fighters. They lived in Knothole village and used guerrilla warfare against Robotnik who had already taken over the main city of Mobius, Mobotropolis, where Sonic and pals had once lived peacefully. The band of rebels was made up of Princess Sally, the smart, computer savvy love interest of Sonic, Tails of course, the cute little two-tailed fox and “little bro” of Sonic. Rotor, the random walrus (always thought it was weird that there was a walrus among the little woodland creatures) who was the resident fix-it guy, basically he was the Sonic version of Chewbacca. He even had that over the shoulder tool-belt/tool-bag thing. Then there was Bunnie, a sweet southern rabbit whom Sonic saved before she was completely roboticized by Dr. Robotnik, thus she has some robotic limbs. She was always calling Sonic “sugar,” and everybody else for that matter. Then there was Antoine, the French Coyote. He was mostly cowardly, annoying and included in missions way too often. Honestly Tails even at his young age would have been more helpful and less annoying than him. I guess you could say Antoine was the C3PO/Lando Calrissian of the show except way less lovable.

Both the serious and the goofy versions of Sonic shows had him just the way we like him: full of attitude, pride, and heroics, chili-dog loving, Robotnik hating, speedy, smooth talking, and voiced by Jaleel White (The guy more commonly known for playing Urkel on Family Matters). But he provided the voice of the Sonic we all know and love.
Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog brought us classic bumbling badniks like Grounder and Scratch. Not to mention the lovable though not the sharpest tacks in the box, Da Bearz! And yes they totally were a reference to those SNL sketch about Da Chicago Bears.
Needless to say, as a kid and hey, even now, Sonic was my hero. Although currently, I no longer don sneakers and run around the backyard to see if I can reach the super speeds of Sonic.

Where is our favorite speedy blue Mobian friend now? He’s still hanging around although not quite as popular as he was in the 90’s. ABC canceled Sonic SatAM before their 3rd season due to a new president and the competition from Fox’s airing Power Rangers at the same time. Seriously yet another reason I hate the Power Rangers. (I wasn’t even allowed to watch it back in the day, but I still thought it was pretty lame). I mean lovable blue hedgehog vs. cheesy bad karate acting. I rest my case.
Basically Sonic became more like the Japanese version than the American version as is evidenced by the games. Bleep Bloop addresses that issue here:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

In 2003 about 10 years after Sonic SatAM first aired, a new anime show aired called Sonic X. It had a way past cool theme song. However the show itself was rather lackluster. Although I admit I used to tune in every week. It was still Sonic, even if it was now cooky anime.Basically Sonic and friends had been transported to earth, and was no longer on Mobius.
The episodes focused more on a typical random anime kid, Tails being more serious and innovative than the cute little bro we once new him as, and everyone dealing with Amy Rose’s fan-girl drama/obsession with Sonic. She was pink and crazy and her voice was obnoxious especially compared to the intelligent, caring, level-headed Princess Sally of SatAM. I confess, there were times when I kinda liked Amy Rose. Plus when I was a kid, I didn’t like Sally much, but she grew on me, whereas Amy Rose just got more annoying.

Where was Sonic in all of this? Off being aloof and and stoic. His attitude became less endearing, and he kept the speed and gained more angst. He went off alone to fight Dr. Robotnik, err… Dr. Eggman, which apparently he was always known as in Japan.

I have, and always will prefer and love the in your face, bold, impatient “I’m waaiitin'” smart-talking, speedy, “Gotta juice” Chili-dog loving, power-ring wielding, catchphrase using, more American-appealing Hero Sonic who wasn’t afraid to you know, be a big bro, give Tails noogies, work with others, state how he really felt about evil “Take that Robuttnik!” and wasn’t afraid to get the girl.